Living is a burden sometimes. We used to subconsciously live, not minding the time spent in our lives. We just lived through the day, enjoying the presence of people. Now, living is just a routine, a never-ending cycle, trying to survive with this mentality — that you should keep going to survive.
Everything is calculated. Every second and minute is accounted for, and though we may lose track of where we are or what day it is, each day we focus more on how we spend our time and whether we waste it doing nothing. Life isn’t the same anymore.
Once you grow up too fast, regret starts. You just wish to be young again when you were still clueless and innocent, facing the world when your only problem was waking up early to go to school or when you’d outgrown your clothes.
Waking up to how the world is takes time to accept. Losing the vision of reality and residing with fanatical desires such as watching movies, playing games, and reading stories that you wish were real life. Everyone has ways to cope. Sometimes, you even wish for the world’s downfall so that you aren’t the only person feeling miserable and everyone experiences the same thing.
It’s the habit of repeating the drill of desperation and outrage, feeling disgusted towards people who are naturally happy and content the way they are. Throwing your insecurities at them and being mad about their skills that you never had but wish to possess.
We are never too content with what we have, nitpicking when we see something about ourselves that is unpleasant, but that is only to our eyes. We strive to make ourselves better people, but that won’t happen; the first task is already a challenge. It is like crossing a road barefoot with scorching fire and broken glass surrounding the floor, while also walking across the other side with a single rope, trying not to fall into the pits of hell.
That is what living is all about. While you try to carry yourself to survive, some can do it on the first try. Then you turn it into a competition instead of admiring their work, because how could they be better than you, right?
The process of life teaches you that everything is not sugarcoated when you grow up. Everyone will be harsh on you when you don’t want a friendly environment. The people existing are not limited to those you know and see every day. Your purpose will not be served if the only challenge you’ll take is meeting new people and getting out of your comfort zone, and that is already pretty challenging on your part.
To live, you must live
